2014 – A year of digging deep and the stuff that got me through.
You could say we bit off more than we could chew last year, but you have to respond to life as it evolves and things don’t always occur at an opportune moment. We made bold decisions and big moves and despite our optimism, it was like wading through treacle from start to finish. Would I make the same decisions again? In a heartbeat, yes! There’s nothing more precious than time with a loved one, or a loved one meeting their grandchild, or seeing your partner flourish, but it hasn’t been easy and there have been many lessons learnt…
Here’s a snapshot of our 2014: While pregnant, we sold our first flat, prepared the 40 year old family home for sale, said goodbye to our beautiful Sydney life and moved to the UK. We lived out of a suitcase for 4 months, worked hard on creating career opportunities, had a baby and settled our daughter into her first year of school. The year was book ended by a family Christmas with all of my husband’s family in attendance (a very rare treat) and the sad, but not unexpected passing of my dear father in law.
It was a challenging time and often a lonely one, but dotted with some real gems and peak experiences. On reflection, these are some of the things that saw me through:
- Movement, any movement. For me it was most often yoga or just walking in the great outdoors. If I had to boil all my top tips down into one it’d be: Move for mental health. It’s that simple.
- Savouring beauty. Nothing clears the head like watching a sunset, a walk through the woods or just looking up at the cloudscape as you walk the city streets. It’s free, so easily accessible and you will find beauty just about anywhere, you just need to fine tune your attention. With practise you’ll find your search for beauty tends to drown out rumination or negative thinking and instantly lifts your mood without much effort.
- Social connection. One of the biggest lessons I learnt this year what just how important other people are to our wellbeing, how easy it can be to make friends and the best bit, just how incredibly kind people are. I found myself chatting to all and sundry in an effort to create new relationships. You never know how all these connections will play out – whether it’s a new walking buddy, someone to share the parenting journey, hints on the best place for coffee, or business referrals, it all helps us feel a sense of belonging, and part of something bigger than ourselves. Digging deep, I found the courage to put myself out there and I was blown away by how kind and welcoming people were.
- Seeking silver linings. I had a lot of practise at this… it always helped me keep my head above water. These are the questions that helped me identify them: What good can come from this? What can I learn from this? How is this helping me to grow? What is it revealing about me or the world? The answers to these questions helped me find balance and a better perspective.
- Knowing my WHY: When all else failed, knowing that there was a solid reason behind our choices made it easier to keep plodding on. Every time I found a trickle of doubt enter my head about our move to the UK I reminded myself that this move was about having time with Dave’s father. It was now or never and hardship seemed to melt away with that perspective. Feeling that we were acting from the heart and taking action guided by our values allowed me to have faith in our path. We’ve been sorely tested but that sense of purpose still buoys us now.
So that’s my (ridiculously crazy) year in review. I hope there were great blessings in your 2014, or at least some pretty spectacular silver linings. If you are facing similar challenges, I hope some of these strategies can help you keep moving forwards too. I am finally emerging from ‘new baby fog’ and time is opening up again. Please drop me a line if I can be of any service to you. We’re in it together.
Much love,
Suzy